Listening is an Important Parenting Tool

Listening is a very important parenting tool, which we often ignore. Our kids are a fountain of information. They want to share every small detail of their day. Tell you about stuff that may seem trivial, but to them it's new and exciting. 

Give them a chance to express themselves. You'll often discover little nuggets of precious information that may actually be helpful to understand your child better. 

Keeping the communication doors open is crucial in this day and age. Kids should feel that they can talk to their parents about anything and not be judged or reprimanded for it. Doing that will just instil a fear in them and drive them further away from you.

A few tips:

1. Listen attentively. 

2. If there is something your child has done that you don't approve of but still shared that information with you, don't flare up and shout. Although its almost a trigger response for most people. "How could you! or how dare you" our go to words. Don't use them. Stay calm. 

3. If you lose your cool you are just sending a message to your child that next time he has done something wrong or is in trouble, he/she shouldn't share it with parents because it will land them in more trouble.

4. Interact with your child and ask him what would he have done differently. Provide probable suggestions or solutions. Discuss possible outcomes. 

5. Express your disappointment at this point in a calm and matter to fact way. And tell them the next time they should apply some of the suggestions mentioned above.

6. Remember they are just kids and are bound to make mistakes. It's up to us as parents to make them learn from them. 

7. Most importantly, BE THERE.